Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Thoughts on Being Thankful ... even when I'm not

I'm hot. Really, really hot. Honestly, I can't ever remember when I felt hotter. What's more ... I'm tired of being hot. There. I said it. And truthfully, it really doesn't make me feel any better. In fact, wallowing in the mud of my miserable situation only makes me feel more ... well, more miserable.

We are going on two weeks since the a/c went out in this courthouse. The latest word is that it will be at least two more weeks before it is repaired. Considering that the elevator has been out since before Christmas and the word ever since has been that it will be fixed "sometime next week" ... well, I guess I'd have to say that things aren't looking good for the a/c or the elevator to be repaired anytime soon.

I could complain about my working conditions. And honestly, I think about complaining a lot. The fact is ... I'm miserable where I work. I hate climbing up the stairs every morning, feeling the temperature rise with each flight I go up. I sit in my office, not moving at all and still the sweat rolls off my back and down my face. I can't think clearly. It's hard to do any work because my mind and my body feel sluggish from the heat. Sometimes I think I just might die because I'm so unbearably hot. I guess what I'm trying to say is that it is hard to be positive about this situation.

And yet ... I don't think that God wants me to complain. His word tells is to be thankful in all situations and to constantly rejoice in the Lord. That doesn't sound like God wants me to sit around with a complaining, ungrateful attitude. Rather, it sounds like He wants me to constantly live in a state of gratitude, even when it is hard.

I can't tell you how many times the past couple of weeks I've asked, "You want me to be thankful and rejoice even in this miserable heat, God?"

And every time He whispers back, "Yes ... even in the miserable heat. Especially in the miserable heat. Especially when life isn't going the way you thought or dreamed or planned that it would. For that's when your attitude becomes a form of worship to me."

Then if that's what it is, Lord, then please, please change my heart!

The LORD will surely comfort Zion and will look with compassion on all her ruins; he will make her deserts like Eden, her wastelands like the garden of the LORD. Joy and gladness will be found in her, thanksgiving and the sound of singing. Isaiah 51:3

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